October 7, 1967 • San Francisco ~ Five months later, on a crisp October day, my father slowly escorts me down the tiled aisle of Holy Name of Jesus, our church in the Sunset. I look like a princess dressed in the white wedding dress that my stepsister Janet wore when she married. It fits like a dream, white lace, quarter-length sleeves, darted to the waist, not a dress I’d have chosen, but beautiful, the train following behind me. With my knees shaking, I can barely smile as my mouth is so parched that my lips are stuck to my teeth like a tongue stuck on a frozen lamppost.
Dad and Cathy
Six-foot-six Father O’Shaughnessy in his black robes, smiling his handsome crooked tan smile, our four bridesmaids (my three high school friends and 14-year-old niece Debbie) dressed in matching full-length empire-waist coral bridesmaid dresses holding bouquets of dyed carnations and baby roses, our four ushers (Bob’s two school friends and two brothers) dressed in gray ascots and black tails, and Bob, looking baby-faced and nervous, wait for us expectantly at the altar. It’s better that I didn’t invite Mom. It would be too hard on Dad and she would have wrecked this and besides, I haven’t seen her in years and she wouldn’t care anyway. I know how much work Marie has done to make this a beautiful wedding, I realize the cost and how Dad used his inheritance money. I think how far everyone has traveled, and I’m not courageous enough to not go through with it and disappoint everybody.
Father O’Shaughnessy, Cathy, Bob
I don’t make promises lightly, but as I peer from under my white net veil at 150 people, our families, our friends, our parents’ friends, Bob’s mother… oh my god, she looks like a leprechaun! Velma is wearing a green knee-length, lace-covered dress with green pantyhose, a green flowered hat and veil, and green eye-shadow. She’s holding a matching handbag and her feet are stuffed into three-inch, dyed-to-match high-heels which just barely makes her five feet tall. As I near hysteria, I glance sideways at my father looking so handsome in his tuxedo, and smell his splash of Old Spice. It settles me down and brings me back to earth. And then I blame him for this whole deal.
Marie and Dad, Cathy and Bob Velma and Lou
“How did I get here? How could this be happening? This is your fault! If you hadn’t jumped up at the dinner table and added your two cents…”
And so, with my family and friends as witnesses and against all my better instincts—with a confused heart, a white train, and a full Mass—I married a boy with about the same thimble-full of common sense as me.
I wanted to, but I didn’t.
to be continued…
© 2018. Catherine Sevenau.
All rights reserved.
Laura, Debbie, Cathy, Sallie (my maid of honor), and Patty at the house on 45th before the wedding
Laura, Patty, Debbie, Sallie, Cathy and Bob, Steve, Mike, Bill, and Mike at the altar of Holy Name
Oct 7, 1967 post-ceremony, friends and family showered us with rice
Family: Steve & Irene, Dusty & Janet, Carleen & Chuck, Esther, Marie & Dad, Debbie, Bob & Cathy, Aunt Elizabeth, Randy, Betty (Liz) & Tony, Marian & Larry (Gordon) Mike, Claudia & Bobby
Clemens siblings: Carleen, Claudia, Larry (Gordon), Cathy, Dad, Betty (Liz)
In Bob’s 1960 Chevy Impala convertible, we’re off to the Awahnee Hotel in Yosemite for a honeymoon
Kathleen Sweeney- Cleary says
I was surprised to see you were married at Holy Name church. That is our parish! Were you living in that area?
Catherine Sevenau says
My apologies, I just saw your comment here. I spent my summers and holidays with my dad and stepmother in the avenues, 45th and Noriega, so yes, Holy Name was our parish also. That’s how I came to know Mr. & Mrs. Sweeney who ran the candy store next to my dad’s Sprouse Reitz.
Susie Price says
You looked so lovely. And so young!!! And you picked a great location for the honeymoon…. Many of us can look at our past selves and think, “How did that happen? I am amazed” ….
Catherine Sevenau says
One of my recurring questions in life is, “How could this be happening to me?”
Barbara D. Jacobsen says
Another parallel….I was wearing a borrowed wedding dress, and also knew I was making a big mistake, but it was too late after my parents spent all that money and invited all those people. I stuck it out for 9 years….you’ll probably be letting us know how long you lasted! At least I found out what I didn’t want!
Catherine Sevenau says
We made it five years. Two businesses, two kids, two Bennett juicers, a 1957 Cadillac and a 1950 Dodge pick-up, a set of wedding china, and a collection of Bob Dylan and Cat Stevens records later…
Daniel Robert Starr says
Wow! What a beautiful Bride!
Catherine Sevenau says
thank you
Ruth Finneman Christenson says
I didn’t have any of this, didn’t want any of this, what I wanted was the honeymoon in Miami. I had a pretty good marriage for 57 years until Chris passed away five years ago.
Catherine Sevenau says
Ruth, I so hope that you got your honeymoon in Miami. And congratulations on your marriage. I imagine you miss Chris very much.
Ruth Christenson says
Yes, we had a wonderful honeymoon in Miami. Catherine, for a number of years, I have been comparing your life with my life.
Catherine Sevenau says
oh dear, is that a good thing or a bad thing…
Kay says
You were a beautiful bride. The dress looks perfect. Your thoughts about your mom are sad. Normal people have mom’s who care. I’ve been kind of jealous of friends who have great relationships with their mothers. Always wondering why can’t she love me like that? Your day was beautiful. I love the family photo.
Catherine Sevenau says
There are normal people who have moms that care, and normal people who have moms that don’t. It must be the luck of the draw.
Jim Chatfield says
You were a beautiful bride. A lot of people at marriage think how in the world did this come about, so you went not alone with that thought.
Dick H says
Thank God you married Bob, look at the two handsome boys you got, I think Bob had something to do with it
Catherine Sevenau says
I received many gifts from being married to Bob, and the boys were just two of them.